Children of Immigrants, POC, Third Culture Folx

Navigating Life as a Third Culture South Asian

Whether you immigrated as a child, were born to immigrant parents, or have a multicultural identity, your experiences are likely very different from your parents’. This contrast can leave you feeling misunderstood, confused, and even lost when trying to find where you fit in.

The duality of growing up between two cultures—the one in which you live and the one shaped by your South Asian family—can be challenging, to say the least. While the broader society may encourage independence and self-discovery, your family may have a very different idea of what’s best for you. Being caught in this cultural crossroads can make it difficult to identify what you truly want for your life. And in many South Asian households, personal choices may not have been something you were ever allowed to have.

The Internal Struggle Between Family and Self

As an adult, you may feel the pull between two strong desires:

✔ The need to make your parents proud and earn their love and approval
✔ The deep longing to live a life that brings you joy and autonomy

This can feel overwhelming and scary, especially when you consider the sacrifices your parents made to create opportunities for you. You might ask yourself:

"Why can’t I just be on board with their expectations and make it work?"

But here’s the truth—it’s not that simple.

You are an individual, with your own needs, desires, and aspirations. You deserve to create a life that feels right for you. Navigating this dual identity can be complicated, but you don’t have to do it alone.

Today’s challenge will not be a forever challenge.

South Asian Person with long red hair leaning against a wall, wearing a dark jacket and green top.

Unique Challenges Faced by Third Culture South Asians

If you’ve ever felt stuck between cultures, you’re not alone. Many South Asians who identify as third culture individuals experience:

  • Identity Crises – Feeling uncertain about where you belong within your cultural heritage and the society you live in

  • Decision-Making Paralysis – Fear of making the “wrong” choice, especially when family expectations are involved

  • Challenges with Boundaries – Struggling to set limits with family while maintaining relationships

  • Internal Conflicts – Feeling torn between prioritizing yourself and fulfilling family obligations

  • Sense of Home & Belonging – Questioning where you truly feel at peace

  • Navigating Family Traditions – Honoring traditions without losing yourself

  • Gender Role Expectations – Feeling pressure to conform to traditional South Asian gender norms

  • Intergenerational Trauma – Carrying the emotional weight of unhealed family wounds

  • Being the ‘Good’ Son or Daughter – Struggling with guilt when you make choices that differ from family expectations

  • Relationships & Dating – Balancing personal preferences with cultural expectations around marriage and partnerships

Your story is unique—there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to navigating this space.

Honor Your Heritage Without Self Sacrifice

Living between cultures can be overwhelming, especially when there’s no clear roadmap. But here’s the good news:

✔ You don’t have to reject your South Asian heritage to live authentically
✔ You don’t have to abandon your own needs to maintain cultural connection
✔ You get to define what honoring your culture looks like for you

At Revolutionary Reflections, our approach isn’t about dismissing South Asian culture—it’s about embracing it in a way that aligns with your personal values and desires.

As an Indian therapist, I won’t tell you what to do. But I will use my understanding of gender roles, caste/class dynamics, and intergenerational expectations to help you question and navigate the strong cultural systems that often limit us.

Because at the end of the day, your life = your choice.

Indian Man holding a baby indoors, both looking at the camera.

Culture Shapes Your Everyday Challenges

At Revolutionary Reflections, we recognize that unspoken cultural rules shape how you view the world and even how stress manifests.

Your anxiety may not stem from “overthinking” or being a “perfectionist.” Instead, maybe it’s because your Indian, Pakistani, Bangladeshi, or Sri Lankan immigrant parents didn’t allow mistakes as a child—because excellence and perfection, were the only options.

So now, every choice feels monumental. You second-guess yourself. You feel stuck in self-criticism. And the cycle repeats.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.